Reiki Cures Hangovers : Memoir

Mara was the ultimate hippy chick. Red hair, Gothic clothing and tattooed tits. I met her at a club when we were all ‘off our trolleys’ as we liked to say. Spun out on pills and big fat smiles, hugging each other and talking shit. Out of all the people I met during those years Mara was to become one of my few firm friends. A soul mate along life’s path. My taste and style was sharp and expensive suits from Covent Garden and hanging out with the lads at the weekend. She was more Left-field to my Duran Duran. A girl who was happy to roll around in the mud at Glastonbury while I flounced around on the dance floors of glamorous nightclubs in London. Mara had become my bridge to the other world of spirituality as we forged ever further ahead into unknown territory. Yoga workshops, Reiki classes, past life regression and anything else that would open my third eye to the etheric realms.

I was crashed out on the sofa after another Friday night out when Mara suggested an alternative to the hangover cure. ‘Oi Chris. Fancy a yoga workshop to clear that hangover,’ said Mara. ‘I don’t think I can lift my legs off the sofa never mind into some yogic pose.’ I finished my pint of orange juice and went back to my hangover film. ‘How about some Reiki. You don’t have to do anything. It’s just energy. Maybe that’ll clear your hangover.’ Mara flipped her legs up against the wall in some kind of yogic taunt but it just made my stomach puke. She never drank alcohol. ‘Will it give me more energy and get rid of this hangover?’ I asked. ‘It could do and re-balance your chakras.’ I wasn’t too sure where my chakras were but I knew that something needed re-balanced.

tatooedgirl

I headed off down the high street to try and clear this hangover. I walked down the high street until I came across what had to be the only kind of spiritual healing shop around. The words ‘Reiki Healing’ were emblazoned across the shop window in an array of bright colors that jarred my senses. I opened the door nearly knocking the Indian dream catcher of its hook, hoping I hadn’t upset the great ancestors. A lady appeared through a doorway that was draped with hanging beads. She was all purple flowing robes from head to toe. She had large silver dolphin earrings and a very friendly smile. ‘Is this a past life healing or just this life?’ she said in all seriousness. ‘Shall we stick with this life. I have enough trouble remembering last night never mind my last life,’ I said. ‘Out on the town again were you?’ she asked. ‘One to many as always.’

I can feel the energy from your kidneys. It’s not good.’ She went to feel my side and then started waving her hands around as if she were drawing in the air. I lay on the therapy couch and gladly closed my eyes as Christine started moving her hands across my body. No touching was involved. I would just feel the air brush against me while she made certain signs and symbols in the air. I felt a warmness flowing into my body and slowly I fell into a deep sleep. Christine managed to do what no paracetamol or English breakfast could ever have done and fully restored my mind to a pre-hangover condition.

chakras

After forty-five minutes I stood up feeling like a new man. ‘Just stand up so I can clear your aura.’ I stood up feeling as bright as a button and allowed her to do her funny stuff. ‘Did you enjoy the Reiki?’ she asked.‘Sure, it was incredible. It completely cured the hangover.’ She continued to blow smoke from some kind of incense stick while flicking a feather around me. ‘I don’t want to frighten you but can I tell you something.’ Oh God, I thought, she’s going to ask me out. How embarrassing.

You have a ghost at the base of your spine.’

I looked at her not wanting to put her into the category of complete nutcase and just smiled. ‘Really.’ I started to put my jacket on to leave. ‘He’s there as part of your karma and he’ll follow you around until you have learned a few things. I’m not a psychic but I sense a tough life in you and that’s what will help you in your purpose later on in life.’

Ghost. Purpose. I said my thanks to her and took what she said with a pinch of salt. As I walked back down the road feeling as right as rain I felt my lower back. Ghost indeed.

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